Lost and found in the auto pound

By Jon Cohn | Community Contributor

Published April 6, 2018

If you’ve ever had your car towed, you know the pain and misery of dealing
with trying to get it back. It’s one of those life experiences we could do without. But, did you know that New Eastside is home to Chicago’s finest
auto pound?

If you check the City of Chicago website, our auto pound is listed right at the top.
Does that mean we are ranked number one for best auto pound? Maybe it has to
do with the beautiful new landscaping surrounding the site. Have you noticed the freshly scraped pieces of blacktop on the ground lately? Lovely, really lovely.

In fact, the 400 E. Lower Wacker location is known as “The Central Auto Pound.” Do people pay extra to extricate their vehicle from our exclusive neighborhood? “Come for the car, stay for the urban oasis” could be our new tourism motto.

Now, truth be told, if you’ve been down there, you know it is not a pretty sight. Steven Spielberg could use the place as a setting for his next horror movie. It’s got all the essentials—mysterious darkness, an out of the way location, strange sounds, scary
echoes, shady characters, innocent civilians and quite possibly, questionable money
exchanges. What more could you want?

We could title this scare flick, “Lost and Found in the Auto Pound.” Wouldn’t Christopher Walken be perfect as the auto pound director—or maybe Jack Nicholson?

Ironically, the only time that dingy area ever looked good was when Bumblebee and his friends from the Transformers movies would spend their lunch hour parked—when they were not out saving the world, of course—along the curb while tourists and locals gawked and took pictures. No doubt they read Yelp and headed down there for the food trucks.

Bottom line, if Optimus Prime found it a great place to spend his time, you can add our lovely auto pound to the list of great things we are proud of here in our New
Eastside neighborhood.

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